A Cry in the Dark

Thursday, September 27, 2007

everything in slow motion....

I don’t know why I’m having such a struggle today. It feels as thought it takes a tremendous effort to do anything. The medications are making me dizzy, so walking across the room means looking like I’ve had a few too many drinks. By the end of the day, I’ll probably have a dozen bruises on my legs that I’ll have no memory of getting!

I’m just exhausted. Every time I lie down, it’s a struggle to work instead of falling asleep. There’s so much work to get done, and I’m falling further and further behind....

Of course, I’m getting more and more anxious about tomorrow. The procedure is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon, so I get to stress about it all day. *sigh* I keep trying to stay positive about it, but I’m dreading the pain.

This time, I decided to go ahead and stay drugged until after I’m home. Maybe that’s part of my problem. I’m so medicated that I just can’t function. Talking with Sir last night, we came to the conclusion that trying to tough it out didn’t work last time, so I need to try something different this time.

I hate being so cranky like this. It’s depressing. I feel like I’m standing beside myself and seeing a person I really don’t like. When will this hell end?

He gave me a surprise visit by coming over the other night. It is still putting a smile on my face today. I’ll see Him tomorrow, so all should be right in my world....

Have I mentioned that, on top of everything else, I’m having a really bad hair day?

Posted by WistfulWench :: 1:13 PM :: 3 comments